Plane Crazy
by josie hardy
Summary: Frank and Joe Hardy are used to being flown around in their father's plane. But this time, it isn't available and they're forced to make use of a curious little charter airdot... (Should be a crossover, but the other category doesn't exist.)
1. Chapter 1

**As you might be able to tell, this was supposed to be a submission for a Valentine's contest, but I made a mistake with the email :p **

**This is an HB/Cabin Pressure crossover... hopefully you can enjoy even if you don't know what CP is. (If you don't, it's a radio play, go find it and listen to it!)**

**Disclaimer: Not mine. Not the characters, not the book titles referenced. The story is, though. :D**

* * *

"What do you mean, you can't?" Joe Hardy heard the whine in his voice, but didn't care at that moment.

"_I mean I can't,"_ Jack Wayne retorted cheerfully, _"sorry boys, but your dad said I was off the clock, and now I'm not available. Course, I could give you a charter firm recommendation…"_

The brothers exchanged a look at the sly tone the pilot's voice had taken on. Jack wasn't known for his practical jokes, but given the lack of flights and their need to get home to spend Valentine's Day with their girlfriends, they didn't have too much choice anyway.

"Go on then," Frank accepted.

Jack gave them the details, hanging up with a cackle.

* * *

"MJN Air," Joe read the sign over the small portacabin door. "I wonder what that stands for."

"My Jet Now."

Both boys jumped, spinning to face the owner of the enthusiastic voice, who turned out to be a man in his early thirties with a boyish face and wide grin to match.

"Where did you come from?" Frank asked.

He leaned in closer. "I can't tell you that. I was being a spy. A ninja spy. You're never supposed to know where a ninja spy is. But hey, you guys aren't very secretive," he looked almost disappointed.

"Uh… I'm Joe Hardy, and this is my brother, Frank. I don't know what you mean by secret, but… we are detectives."

"Right," the grin returned. "And detectives need to be able to follow people quietly, so that was what I was doing. I did well, didn't I?"

"Yeah, you did," Frank couldn't help returning the grin.

"Arthur!" an authoritative voice called from inside the portacabin, "what are you doing out there? Let them come in, go and get the plane ready."

"Right mum," Arthur responded cheerfully, "bye, guys!"

"Bye," the boys chorused.

* * *

_Bing Bong!_

"Good evening and welcome aboard this MJN flight to Bayport," a posh British voice came over the intercom, "I'm Douglas Richardson, and I will be your co-pilot tonight. We have Miss Marple in the pilot's seat, and attending to you in the cabin, Jessica Fletcher and your steward for the flight… Scooby Doo."

"Heeey," Arthur protested.

"Shaggy?"

"Brilliant!"

"Do sit back and enjoy the flight."

_Bing Bong!_

Douglas turned off the intercom with a self-satisfied grin.

"Miss Marple?" Martin raised an eyebrow.

"I thought you liked being Miss Marple. Who was I to argue? You're no Sherlock Holmes."

"I'm surprised you didn't say you were," Martin muttered.

"Don't be silly. If anyone, I'm James Bond."

Martin snorted.

"Mystery books with "otter" in the title," Douglas announced. "The Case of the Missing Otters. The Mystery of the Flying Otter."

"Oh!" Martin exclaimed. "This is an easy one. Um…"

"The Sign of the Crooked Otter."

"Good one! Um… ooh! What Happened at Otter?"

"Hmm," Douglas responded. "Not bad."

The cabin door opened, and their boss, Jessica – Carolyn Knapp-Shappey – Fletcher entered.

"Nice boys, but so dull," she groaned. "So? What game are we playing?"

"Mystery books with "otter" in the title," Martin supplied.

"Oh. Well, let's see… The Otter of the Baskervilles!"

"Good one!" Douglas congratulated. "The Sinister Otter."

"So you've left them alone with Arthur?" Martin asked.

"They're teenagers. If they can't handle him, I'm sure I don't know who can."

* * *

"Hi!"

The boys looked up to see Arthur grinning at them, pushing along a refreshments cart.

"Shaggy," Joe grinned. "What's up?"

"Can I interest you in anything? Food, drink, movie?"

_Bing Bong!_

"The Vanishing Otters." Douglas said.

"The Melted… oh, no," Carolyn began.

"Um…" Martin struggled.

"Secret Otter on Flight 101," Douglas interjected.

"The Masked Otter!" Martin exclaimed.

"Very good!" Douglas and Carolyn congratulated him. "We knew you'd get it eventually."

"Hang on," Martin remarked, "why is the intercom on?"

"Oh, is it?" Douglas asked innocently.

_Bing Bong!_

"What was all that about?" Frank wondered.

"Oh, the chaps always play a word game during flights," Arthur explained. "Skip's usually not very good at them though," he added sympathetically.

"Miss Marple?" Joe confirmed.

Arthur grinned. "It involves a rich old man and his fancy whisky, which mum always buys and Douglas always steals, and Skip tries to stop him but he can't."

"Right," the boys drawled.

"So, you're heading home for Valentine's?" Arthur asked. "I bet you've got girlfriends."

"We do," Frank admitted. "Mine's called Callie, his is Vanessa."

"That's nice." He looked at the tray thoughtfully. "I'll be right back!" he announced.

"Jack knew about all this," Joe muttered, settling back in his seat to await the steward's return.

"Airdot," Carolyn, who had earlier introduced herself as CEO, corrected them. "I only have one jet, and you can't put one jet in a line. If MJN is anything, it is an airdot."

The boys laughed.

"Dare I ask what that silly boy is up to?"

"Valentine's Day gave him an idea," Frank supplied.

"Oh god," Carolyn groaned.

"Ow!" Arthur yelped in the galley.

"Arthur?"

"It's fine! Everything's fine! No need to come in, it's… it's a surprise!"

"I can't wait." She smiled at the boys. "Do you need anything? He's going to be a while. If I'm not mistaken, that was the sound of everything falling out of the cabinet on top of him."


	2. Chapter 2

_Bing Bong!_

"Arthur?" Douglas asked. "I have a little mystery for you."

Arthur's head poked out of the galley. "A mystery? Brilliant!"

"What's brown and hot, comes in a cup and should be in here?"

"Um… ooh. An otter?"

"No…"

"Douglas…" Martin complained.

"Give him a chance, Martin. Arthur, do you have an otter?"

"Uh… no."

"Well then. This is something you have."

"Actually, it's something you have the equipment to make," Carolyn put in. "Think really hard."

"What do we have every flight?" Martin prodded.

"A game? Fun? No, food! Wait… no! I got it! You chaps want your coffees," he grinned, "Coming up."

"See? I told you he'd get it."

_Bing Bong!_

* * *

"What is that?" Carolyn asked warily when Arthur appeared a few minutes later with a small stack of paper.

He held one out. "See for yourself!"

She rolled her eyes, accepting what appeared to be half a sheet of paper folded into a card.

"And for you!" Arthur handed one to each of the boys.

On the front was a crudely drawn picture of a cupid drawn in what looked like crayon, complete with a bow and arrow and a heart with an arrow shot through it. Inside was the simple message

_Happy Valentine's Day!_

_From Your Secret Admirer x_

"That's cute, thanks," Joe chuckled.

"Daft boy," Jessica pretended to grumble, but couldn't hide the small smile on her lips. "What is this now?" She picked up something that had fallen out of hers; a Queen of Hearts playing card.

"Hearts. Because it's Valentine's Day," Arthur supplied.

"Oh, right. Of course. Well, go on, I'm sure Douglas will love them."

* * *

"Hello chaps!" Arthur greeted as he entered the flight deck.

"Finally!"

"Coffee for you, Douglas, and coffee for you, Skip," he handed them their cups.

"What have you done to them?" Martin asked, raising the cup to study it.

"He's… drawn hearts around them," Douglas realised. "That's nice, isn't it Martin?"

"Lovely!"

"And…" Arthur proudly handed them their cards.

Douglas turned it around, staring at it. "What is it? An otter?"

"I think-" Martin began.

"No, I think it's supposed to be fireworks. A cow?"

"Douglas," Arthur complained, "it's a cupid!"

Douglas turned it around once more. "Oh, so it is!"

"And what's this?" Martin had discovered his playing card.

"Well, Valentine's, and cards had the heart deck… so I found one for you and Douglas and mum."

"King of hearts," Douglas announced.

"Appropriate." Martin muttered.

"I'll have you remember I'm a happily married man. Any previous… indiscretions are history. Why, what's yours?"

"It doesn't matter," Martin set it on the dash face down.

Douglas grabbed it, snatching it out of his captain's grasp. "The Joker," he laughed. "You were saying about being appropriate?"

"Shut up. Yes, thank you Arthur."

* * *

"Where is Bayport, anyway?" Arthur asked his mother, wandering back into the cabin and sitting next to her.

"Near New York."

"Brilliant! I've always wanted to go to New York. Can we?"

She gave him a look. "New York or The Big Apple?"

He grinned. "Apples are brilliant!"

She groaned. "Why don't you annoy the boys for a while. I'm taking a nap."

"Okay!"

He turned around to the two boys across the aisle, who had been grinning at Carolyn's despair.

"Living that close to New York must be brilliant," he announced.

"We don't actually go there that often," Frank admitted.

"We are going for Valentine's, though," Joe told him. "Carriage ride through Central Park, a nice dinner…"

"That sounds fun," Arthur was leaning on the armrest, chin resting on his hands, dreamy smile on his face. "I wish I had a girlfriend," he sighed.

"Have you ever had a girlfriend?" Frank asked.

"That's a whole different game," Douglas announced, having come out to head to the bathroom, "girls with names that sound like puppies."

"They do not!" Arthur argued.

"Minty. Libbett. Pobs." He paused for effect. "Fliss."

Arthur grinned. "Minty was brilliant."

"Arthur, you think everything is brilliant…. Oh, hello!"

He had just noticed Carolyn was asleep, and looked delighted about it.

"Oh Douglas, don't," Arthur pleaded.

"Don't what? Besides, shouldn't you be getting our heart-shaped food ready?"

The young man jumped up. "Great idea Douglas!"

"What are you going to do?" Joe asked warily, half intrigued and half nervous about the diabolical plan.

"You know what, I don't even know yet," he admitted, wandering off on his way.

"They're all insane," Frank observed. "No wonder Jack was so happy about tricking us."

"Oh come on, they're not that bad," Joe countered. "It's not like they can't fly."

"That's true. They've even made you forget you don't like flying," Frank teased.

His brother blinked. "Exactly!"

"If any alarms go off, don't panic," Douglas warned them, sauntering past them on his way back to the flight deck, a bouncy Arthur following behind him.

_Bing Bong!_

"Good evening," Arthur's voice was trembling with excitement, "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen, Arthur Shappey here. I will be your pilot on this trip. Your pilot!" he squealed before Douglas pulled him away.

"This is a very bad idea," Martin fretted.

"Oh, shush, he's not going to actually do anything," Douglas told him.

The blaring of alarms and a sudden jolt suggested he just had.


	3. Chapter 3

The jolt woke Carolyn, who gripped her armrests with wide eyes.

"What are they doing?" she exclaimed.

Realizing the plane had levelled out, she jumped up and headed toward the flight deck, which was locked.

"Open this door!" she yelled.

"It's okay mum!" Arthur yelled back, "I've got it under control!"

"You've… what do you mean, you've got it under control? Where are Martin and Douglas?"

"They're… taking a little nap."

"What?!"

She stumbled against the door as the plane suddenly dipped, and another alarm went off.

"Arthur!"

The door clicked open to reveal a short, red faced man wearing a captain's hat. "Carolyn, I'm sorry, it was all Douglas's idea… Douglas is still flying, see?"

Carolyn pushed past him and strode inside, slamming the door behind her before she started yelling at all three of them.

* * *

"Joe?" Frank waved a hand in front of his pale brother's face. "Joe, are you okay?"

The younger boy slowly broke into a relieved grin, releasing the armrests of his white knuckle grip.

"I'm okay," he answered.

"That went too far," Frank growled, striding over to the intercom. "Carolyn, can we talk to you?"

There was a pause before the white haired woman came out with an apologetic smile.

"Boys, I'm so sorry. So many of our flights are cargo flights that they don't always act… completely professionally. And Douglas being Douglas doesn't help too much even when there are passengers. They shouldn't have done that, and that's exactly what I just told them – the rest of the flight will be completely uneventful."

"My brother's afraid of flying, does he ever stop to consider that?" Frank demanded.

"He did say he warned you… but no, probably not," she looked at Joe sympathetically. "I'm so sorry."

"It's okay," the boy was blushing slightly now. He managed a small smile, "in fact, before all of this I was actually saying how good the flight was."

"They're both great pilots," Carolyn assured them. "Or at least, Douglas is the good one, Martin's the safe one – but between them, they've kept old GERTI going for far longer than anyone ever expected."

"It does seem to be quite an old plane," Frank remarked.

"She is. Mostly gaffer tape and hope by this point."

"How did you think of the name of the airline?" Joe piped up. "Sorry, airdot," he grinned.

"My Jet Now," Carolyn smiled at the memory. "GERTI belonged to my husband, his favourite toy. So when we got divorced, I decided to get it off him. I called it 'my jet now' and started a company with it to annoy him," she cackled. "He tries to buy it back every year."

Arthur quietly slunk out of the flight deck, avoiding their gazes.

"It's okay Arthur, they're not angry with you," Carolyn assured him. "And besides, it wasn't your fault." She turned back to the brothers, "he always wanted to be a pilot, and Douglas knows it."

"That's why he knew you'd fall for it," Frank remarked.

"Right."

"Really?" Arthur looked hopeful.

"Really," they assured him.

"Brilliant! I'm going to go get the food," he informed his mother.

"Great, get to it."

Douglas was the next to make an appearance.

"Carolyn, can we have a minute?"

"Of course," she headed back into the galley, presumably to supervise Arthur.

"I'm sorry," he apologized, "we're the only crew in the company, and we're on every flight together… most of the time we're only scaring cargo. I saw Carolyn asleep for the first time and just couldn't resist taking the chance to give her a scare," he smiled slightly. "Unprofessional, I'll admit."

"It's okay," they assured him. "But maybe just stick to freaking out cargo in future?"

He nodded. "I'll tell Martin to make sure I do, he does so love to be my Supreme Commander."

* * *

"So," Fenton Hardy grinned as they walked out of the airport towards the car, "how was the flight?"

"I can't believe you set us up like that," Frank retorted.

"Did you even care that they might scare me?" Joe asked, pretending to be hurt.

"Actually, if anything I was hoping they might help you. They're all mad, but they're harmless. They didn't do anything too terrible, did they?"

The boys climbed into the car, thinking of the Valentine's cards tucked into their bags.

"It was fun."


End file.
